Guest Blogger Ray Goes to the Clearfield County Fair, Part II

This is a guest blog from my friend Ray in Pennsylvania. Ray is a professional photographer. His web site is Beimel Photographics

    A county fair is a lot of things. At its roots it is an agricultural exhibition. Add to that some entertainment, food, commercial booths, and nowadays, the midway with its rides and attractions. Not to mention the games of skill. This installment will deal more with that aspect. The photo opportunities abound and what with being the invisible photographer, I took advantage of them. But first, ice cream.

    Sunset Ice Cream of Williamsport has a permanent booth in one of the exhibit buildings. I go there hoping against hope that they will have teaberry. They don't. I settle for peanut butter cup. This year they only offered ice cream in cups. I understand that it is faster to serve that way and makes for less mess. But...part of the sensual appeal of ice cream is that you get to use your tongue to eat it, at least when it is in a cone. There is a mouth pleasure in eating an ice cream cone that only a few other activities can give. And then there is the mental alertness required to keep the cone from dripping on a hot summer night. Combine these two and you have a pleasing experience for both mind and body. But no, this time I had to eat my ice cream this way. By the by, you can eat a cone with one hand free. You cannot do that with a cup and spoon. Lady GaGa could have walked in front of me in an outrageous costume and I would not have had a hand free to raise the camera. As it was, nothing interesting happened. But still, my ice cream experience was somewhat deflated..

     Going back into medieval times, fairs and festivals were designed with a singular purpose, to separate the crowd from their money. Of course, in the old days, this was the realm of pickpockets and cut purses, hookers and card sharks. Today it is the game of "skill" wherein doing something not all that hard can get you a worthless prize. Doing something harder can get you a slightly less worthless prize. I watched with some fascination the ring toss booth. 10 rings for a buck, bucket of rings for five bucks, you win what you ring. Prizes included various cheap knifes, cheap air pistols, cheap whips. Yes, whips. Keep in mind that you choose what you throw your ring at. Granted that the targets are revolving but you would think that people would be throwing at the better prizes. While I watched, I saw 6 whips and 2 knives won. And often enough the whips were won by adult women. Does this tell us something about the size of the BDSM community in Clearfield County? Or is it just some kind of potential fantasy fulfillment? I don't know and I didn't ask.

    Consider this scenario. I walk up to a woman who has just won a whip. I ask, "Now that you won a whip at the ring toss booth, what are you going to do with it?" The next thing that happens is my trying to explain the scholarly nature of my inquiry to the beefy Lawrence Township policeman.

   The two women running the ring toss were dancing the huckley buck trying to keep up with all the customers. Of course, part of the attraction might have been that the younger one was wearing Daisy Dukes and the job involved much bending over. Farther away, this carnie was having a lonely night. I figure he was using the wrong bait. But upon further consideration, I don't think he would have looked good in Daisy Dukes.

    One of the old standbys in the carnie trade is the fish bowl game. Land a ping pong ball in a bowl, get a goldfish whose life expectancy is measured in hours. Although I must say that nephew Eric won a goldfish and kept it alive for years. Right after I took this picture, the little goober in question won a fish. Now once you win a fish, you are pretty much closed out for the rides because you can't hang on for dear life while holding a baggie with a fish in it. I did note that the baggies now come printed with directions for keeping your fish alive.

    Amusement park rides often make for good pictures. I wandered over to that part of the midway and worked the concept, as photographers say when they are not sure what they are trying to do. Amusement park rides are relatively simple in nature. They all submit your body to forces not normally felt, thus increasing your heart rate. Kind of like sex except that little girls can watch you on whirling rides.

    You have your choices as to how you want to experience G forces. You can rotate at the end of a chain or you can be strapped in a chair, whirled and tilted at the same time. The photo on the left would have been more dramatic if a certain photographer had enough sense to bring a bigger flash. For the photo geeks out there, these were all taken with a 7 year old Nikon D100 with a fixed focal length 35mm f2 lens with the ISO set to 400, without a tripod (which would have made things better but even I am not enough of a photo geek to take a tripod to a fair unless getting paid for it.)

    I was looking at the chains that held the swings and I was thinking I might like something a bit more substantial. We make such an act of faith when we get on amusement rides. The skeevy looking guy in the black T shirt who took your ticket is sometimes the same guy who maintains the ride. Does he look like the kind of guy you would want to be changing the oil in your car let alone judging the breaking strength of a chain that is there is between your safety and being flung into the middle of the parking lot?

    The tilt and whirl device was very popular as witnessed by this line to get on the thing.

    I might be cynical but looking at the line I am thinking the big appeal was the opportunity for the under 16 crowd to get squeezed closely together in circumstances where a stealthily copped feel could happen. Either that or these kids really like G forces. The area where the serious rides were was largely populated with middle schoolers. In fact, the whole fair was swarming with them. To look around would make you wonder why school boards were concerned about declining enrollments.

    I did not ride anything but if I had, it would have been the bump cars and the Ferris wheel. I am rather sorry now that I didn't ride the Ferris wheel as that would have given me an aerial view of things and that might have been a good photo. These bump cars were on a platform a little too small to get up to ramming speed and what is the point of the bump cars if not to cause whiplash. I wasn't sure but I thought I saw a sign that said "This ride sponsored by the American Chiropractic Association. The kid in the picture seemed to have the right idea.

  Did you ever notice that there is always some lights out on the Ferris wheel?

    This ride seemed pretty tame until I thought about the sensations you would get while on it. Positive G forces followed by negative G forces as you went up and down seemed like just the ticket to cause yakking, hurling, barfing, spewing, blowing lunch, spilling cookies, upchucking, and projectile vomiting. Interesting that we have so many terms for the same act. Penguin regurgitates and it is food for the chick. Kid regurgitates and it is a chore for the carnie. When you consider the amount of junk food eaten by all present, I am surprised there were not more incidents of reverse peristaltic maneuvers.

    Another aspect of the fair is the entertainment. The big grandstand had Bret Michaels ( who is he? If any of my readers can help me with that, please do so). That of course costs lots of money and photography is forbidden at concerts anyway. But at the small stage the Moore Brothers band was playing. I have been running into these guys at weddings for years and they are good entertainers. As near as I can tell, only two of them are really Moore brothers. They still put on a good show. They cover everybody from Elvis to the Beatles to Willie Nelson. Their concert is free and you can take pictures.

    After taking 150 pictures, eating a pork barbecue sandwich, fresh cut fries, a cheese steak, ice cream, and finally a corn dog, I was ready to go home. But first, I took this picture to show you the variety of gustatory temptations that will assault you.

    Fairs are fun. The crowds are interesting. The food is appealing and tasty. Of course it is tasty. It is full of fat and salt, two things desperately wanted by primitive man as he strove for survival on the savanna. We don't need such foods now but an occasional indulgence followed by some self denial and exercise will overcome the bad effects. I put this picture last just to illustrate what happens if you eat too much fair food.

    And that's the fair story. Elk County has a much smaller fair this week but I don't think I will get there. This might well be my last festival thing of the season. I hoped you enjoyed the story and the pictures. Wishing all of you good days ahead,  Ray

Thanks, Ray, and thanks for reading.